All of this hurt, all of it, over a heartbreak that I can't get over. I can't stand to be alone but I lock myself in. Why am I unloveable?
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Teenage Suicide..Don't do it
For me suicide has never been a matter of it but when. I don't know why I think this way. I've tried to kill myself more than once, OD's mostly and it never works. I'm 34 now and I now for a fact I'll never make it to 40. Now, no, this is not a cry for help. I'm not sitting here with a gun in hand. I just know I'm not one of those people who's meant to be around that long. I really have nothing to give. I have maybe one real friend. If I did want to kill myself I'd have no one to call and say "come over I need you now". No kids, no love. Honestly the only thing that keeps me alive is my dog. If I'm gone, who would take care of her?
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No you are not unlovable, and if I was closer I would come and see you. Iam 40 and can say I do not have any real friends that I can depend on, in fact to come think about it I never really have. Wow Iam not sure what it is, I blame the town..lol. When you least expect it love will find you! Hugs and kisses.
ReplyDeleteHey you, where are you?! Are you not on FB anymore?! You have SO much to offer, the fact that you don't see it is just this cloud hanging over you. It can/will get better. You are such an amazing spirit, so generous, maybe too much so with your heart and that has gotten you hurt. Don't give up, please don't really I want to get in touch with you, I'm not that far away...
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